• neonred@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    Why shouldn’t I congratulate someone for their body? It’s not a given to have a good functioning, well-toned, healthy and strong body musculature. It requires determination and willpower.

    • Droggelbecher@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      Nothing wrong with a physical compliment, especially if it’s something they chose or worked on. But it’s nice to know that others notice that you’re more than just a good looking body as well.

      • neonred@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        Complimenting the body does not imply neglecting wits. You are not only a body but your body is an inherent part of what and who you are.

        But I get the impression complimenting on physical attributes is frowned upon nowadays.

        • Droggelbecher@lemmy.world
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          5 months ago

          Of course complimenting fitness isn’t implying you’re only a body. But why do you compliment people in the first place? To make them feel nice. Let them know their good qualities don’t go unnoticed. And for that purpose it’s good to compliment a variety of nice qualities of theirs.

          The last bit, I honestly wouldn’t know. I haven’t gotten the impression, but that might just be my peer group.

        • Lemmilicious
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          5 months ago

          Complimenting the body is not meant to communicate neglected wits, but that doesn’t mean it never does. I had a friend who all their life received compliments for their body only, and not for anything about their personality. Even though I agree that their body was inherent part of who they were, it’s hard to blame them for feeling like their personality was bland and irrelevant, and that this feeling got reinforced by receiving more complements about their body.

    • TheSambassador@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      A friend of mine had some unexpected health issues, and lost a ton of weight. They looked good before and after, but they were really uncomfortable when people would “compliment” them on their “weight loss”. It wasn’t something that they had tried to do, and it was a reminder of the health problems that they’d been struggling with.

      I think complimenting someone’s body AFTER they’ve told you they’ve been working on it (or if it’s obvious they’ve been working on it, say with muscle gain) is totally fine, but their experience really changed my mind on those types of compliments.

      Sometimes something that you’d think was 100% a compliment can have other effects. My friend wasn’t necessarily upset at the people who thought they were complementing them, but the best compliments are for who a person is and how they make the world around them better.