Not being diagnosed with ADHD until my 30’s, I was concerned about taking stimulants… Man did they ever highlight all the ways I had adjusted my life to try and cope, and all the self-medicating I was doing with caffeine and energy drinks. While some adjustments were still necessary, I could finally do things like:
- wash the dishes without wanting to peel my skin off
- regularly cook meals instead of eat garbage
- get my work done in a normal 8 hour day instead of taking 12 hours and stressing out all day about the time I was wasting and ultimately having no time for my chores
Considering how damn hard it is to get meds now because everyone else is abusing them, I’m off them more often than I’m on them. Back to negative performance reviews, stressful days, viciously hating what should be boring or mildly annoying tasks for anyone else. Only difference now is I don’t hate myself because I finally understand what parts of this are and are not my fault. I mean that helps me live with myself but I’d really rather just have meds again.
I once asked a friend with a truck to help me pickup a BBQ. When attempting to load it he got so worried about us scratching the truck bed that eventually we couldn’t proceed. Called another buddy with a minivan, we put a moving blanket down and off we went. No whining, just work.