So straight out the gate: I don’t ever really flirt (yes, even if I like the girl). And I’m not sure whether I should change strategies. So hence my question.

Note: I am a guy.

Edit: Thank you all for your input. I have come to the realisation I need to let the other party (better) know I am romantically interested in them. Either by means of flirtation or otherwise.

  • Fat Tony@lemm.eeOP
    3·
    6 days ago

    I don’t know why everyone else here says “No.” Maybe it’s down to preference.

    Well, at least it makes the discussion more interesting.😅

    And I usually don’t have any ulterior motives.

    Well I for one usually do have said ulterior motives (I want to see them romantically). Shouldn’t I then be a bit more (flirtatiously) direct with them?

    • hendrik@palaver.p3x.deEnglish
      2·
      6 days ago

      Sure. I think being honest is a solid choice, generally speaking. There is some etiquette. If you’re way too direct, you might be perceived as a creep. But you certainly have to do something, or it won’t lead anywhere.

      Telling people you want to stay in contact, or you think they’re attractive, or you like their outfit, or whatever people do for flirting seems to be alright. Some people crack jokes and try to be funny, or interesting… Whatever floats your boat. I think the one important thing is to read the room. See if they’re comfortable. And if they enjoy talking to you, or if you’ve just cornered them and are monologuing. Most (not all) people can do that. And I’d say as long as everyone is comfortable, it’s the right thing. I mean you have to send some signals for them to know what’s up with you. So yeah, that kind of directness might be helpful. And after that, spending time together (and not just in a larger group) is a signal, too, in my opinion.

      I don’t think there is any general, correct way of doing it. It just depends on the situation, on who you are, and especially what the other person likes.